smilingfork:

Lemon and Semen Cake

Difficulty:
★★★★★ (very hard)

Yield:
12 slices

Healthiness:
89%

Ingredients:

• 2 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup butter
• 1 1/4 cups white sugar
• 3 eggs
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1 cup milk
• 1 tablespoon of semen
• 1/2 cup fresh lemon juice
• 1 tablespoon cornstarch
• 6 tablespoons butter
• 3/4 cup white sugar
• 4 egg yolks, beaten
• 4 cups confectioners’ sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, softened
• 2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
• 1 teaspoon semen
• 2 tablespoons milk

Equipment:

• 1 large stainless steel bowl
• 1 saucepan
• 1 small bowl
• 1 medium bowl
• 1 or 2 males

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour two 8 inch round pans. Mix together the flour, baking powder and salt. Set aside.
2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 5 minutes. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla. Beat in the flour mixture alternately with the milk, mixing just until incorporated.
3. Pour batter into prepared pans. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the cake comes out clean. Allow to cool in pans on wire racks for 10 minutes. Then invert onto wire racks to cool completely.
4. To make filling: In medium saucepan, mix together 1 tablespoon of semen, 1/2 cup lemon juice and 1 tablespoon cornstarch until smooth. Mix in 6 tablespoons butter and 3/4 cup sugar, and bring mixture to boil over medium heat. Boil for one minute, stirring constantly. In small bowl, with a wire whisk, beat egg yolks until smooth. Whisk in a small amount of the hot semen-lemon mixture. Pour the egg mixture into the sauce pan, beating the hot semen-lemon mixture rapidly. Reduce heat to low; cook, stirring constantly, 5 minutes, or until thick (not to boil).
5. Pour mixture into medium bowl. Press plastic wrap onto surface to keep skin from forming as it cools. Cool to room temperature. Refrigerate 3 hours.
6. To make frosting: In large bowl, beat confectioners’ sugar, 1/2 cup butter, 2 tablespoons lemon juice and 1 teaspoon semen until smooth. Beat in milk, and increase speed and continue to beat until light and sticky.
7. To assemble: With long serrated knife, split each cake layer in half horizontally, making 4 layers. Place 1 layer, cut side up, on a serving plate. Spread with half of the semen-lemon filling. Top with another layer, and spread with 1/2 cup frosting. Add third layer, and spread with remaining half of the semen-lemon filling. Press on final cake layer, and frost top and sides of cake with remaining frosting. Refrigerate cake until serving time so the semen does not spoil.

You can experiment with flavors by asking your benefactor(s) to ingest different fruits.

Photo from www.Gourmet.com

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and semen cake.